A Legacy

I have posted from a previous blog of my relationship with Grandma Ruby. Besides my parents, she has had most of the influence upon my life. At one point, she lived with us while I was a child growing up in Booneville, Arkansas. I remember many mornings waking up & going into Grandma Ruby's bedroom & crawl in bed with her & ask her to tell me stories about when my Dad was a little boy. One of my favorite stories was the one where my Dad & his brothers, who all grew up poor in southwest AR, all got into it over who would get the last biscuit on the breakfast table. After a while, Grandma got so fed up with the squabbling, she ran out the back door of their rickety old house & out to the edge of the well where she shouted back to the boys that she was going to jump in if they didn't stop their arguing. She said she remembers looking at 4 little heads all peeking out the door to see if she was serious about doing it. And it did stop the bickering, too.

Grandma Ruby spent a lot of her time laughing, too. Sometimes she would laugh at inappropriate times & try to gain her composure back before smiling & sweetly saying, "I'm sorry...". Grandma Ruby would always find something funny about most every situation in life.

Last night about 1am, Grandma Ruby entered into Heaven's Gates laughinig.

She had just turned 99 years old not even 2 months ago. And now, God is laughing, too.

Grandma Ruby is laughing with the Lord because she is now the happiest she's ever been. She has been reunited with her 3 prior husbands, her 2 sons (including my father), her long lost baby sister she never met because she was given up for adoption as an infant, and scores of others who have gone on before her. Heaven is echoing with her voice as she belts out that infectious cackle that I used to hear late at night as a child, going to bed before all the adults would. I couldn't hear what they were talking about, but every time I would hear that high-pitched belly laugh, I would smile.

I get daily email messages from a website called "FamilyFirst". As if it were divinely timed, the message I received today - the day I learned about Grandma Ruby's passing - talked about leaving a legacy....

Webster's Dictionary says a legacy is "something handed down from one who has
gone before." What kind of legacy are you building? Well, no matter how hard you
work or how much money you make, your lasting legacy won't be the material
things you leave behind. What will last is the kind of relationship you have
with your kids. It will directly affect not only your children, but generations
to come. So give them what the years cannot take away -- the legacy of your
time, your love, your self.

Grandma Ruby left a legacy all right. She left a legacy that taught me I should never take everything too seriously. To leave room for laughter. Grandma had a relationship with her kids & her grandkids that was sprinkled full of love & laughter. And it is this I will carry with me and share with my children. She proved that at age 99, laughter really is the best medicine.

For her 99th birthday this year, I wanted to send Grandma a colorful floral arrangement because I knew that with suffering from breast cancer for over a year, her time was short. And I wanted to tell her that the flowers represented the brilliance she contributed to my life. Even though I could only see her once a year at my annual Thanksgiving trip home, I would never think of not making that extra trip - an additional 100 miles or so - to include a visit to the nursing home where Grandma Ruby spent her final days. And I would never think of not allowing my two boys to briefly get to know, even in their young lives, this woman who will live on in my life as a true legacy.

I love you, Grandma.